How do I describe this feeling, Soledad?

I don’t know why I am feeling it just this past few days. Soledad.

Soledad is a Spanish name for a girl which means “solitude or loneliness.”

I was feeling so lonely that I just wanted to be alone. I wanted to do things alone. I felt I was being left behind by the things that I was running after. And then it turned out that I don’t know what I am chasing for.

I know I am blessed because I am surrounded with people who truly loves me and I believe it. How can I share this emptiness if nobody knows the deepest of me. I just can’t and it left me lonely and helpless.

Soledad. I am so alone. Sometimes, I just wanna go back to the time when someone has loved me for me. It’s just a lost I can’t replaced. Now I know, it’s my lost not her.

I don’t know how to describe this feeling but I don’t want  it. I don’t want to be there.